One day we’ll see you again…with that same old beautiful smile…
Rest In Peace, Dave. We love you.
Tomorrow may never come
For you or me
Life is not promised
Tomorrow may never show up
For you and me
This life is not promised
I aint no perfect man
Im trying to do, the best that I can,
With what it is I have
My umi said shine your light on the world
Shine your light for the world to see
My abi said shine your light on the world
Shine your light for the world to see
Sometimes I feel like crying
Sometimes my heart gets heavy
Sometimes I just want to leave and fly away…
Filed under: New Shit, Rants and raves | Tags: beef don, katt williams, the bay
This shit is hella goooood!!!
This shit is hella funnnny!!!
This shit is hella perfeeect!!!
The facts are as follows: Beef Don is the true don. Katt Williams is the funniest man on planet earth and my newest addiction. He’s actually coming to San Francisco in two weeks but the remaining tickets are $180 each. I love you Katt but I love my money more and I know you can respect that because your tagline is “where funny makes money”. True. Lastly, the everyday landscapes of this city are spoiling the shit out of me! The past couple of days have stayed warm and beautiful right up until the fog rolls in and I am taking full advantage. Parks, ice cream, more parks, more ice cream. Shout out to dude who mumbles “Ganja treats” everytime he passes you at Dolores Park pushing baked goods in a cooler. I have NEVER seen anyone purchase anything from him but I respect the hustle. (I would suggest working on the subtlety of the pitch, boo). Quick digression: I call everyone “boo” y’all dudes need to stop reading into that shit. Another Quick Digression: Why do dudes in the bay love hollering from moving vehicles? What is the best case scenario? Have any of you been hollered at in a car right before dude gets stuck at a red light? it is SO funny. Maybe i’ll do a stand up routine on that one day…Also, dudes love screaming the word “eye candy” around here. Y’all are wildin!!! I feel like I’m in a fucked up “The Pack” music video everytime I leave the house. Trust me, that is not a good thing. Sometimes I think Young L and Uno are cute and that’s why I believe in the impending apocalypse. Moving right along, Christine just took me to the ill sushi spot in our neighborhood–lower haight. I’m slowly but surely learning where to take you all when you come visit. Bring an appetite. I’m only now beginning to come down from the sake buzz…LIGHTWEIGHT. Haters, fall back. It’s lovely to be back home in my completely empty apartment. Seriously:
<—I’m sitting right there. On that air mattress. Truth be told, I’m getting used to this whole pseudo-minimalist lifestyle. Not to mention the previous tenant was a practicing Tibetan Buddhist who still gets publications called “Snow Lion” sent to the apartment. I’m not sure what bullshit connection I’m trying to make between minimalism and Tibetan buddhism but whatever. I definitely need a chair. I thought the kitchen counter top would be a sufficient substitute but I’m worried my ass will prematurely flatten and that’s not a good look. In case you were wondering, the job search marches on. I have to bite the bullet and put Yelp on blast for the following “Community Manager” job listing on ventureloop.com:
As the Yelp Community Manager, you’ll be a full-time Yelp employee doing whatever it takes to grow the community of active yelpers as the Yelp “Mayor” in your city. Working out of your home and anywhere with WiFi, you’ll lead Yelp’s success in your city, and will be an integral member of a team of all-stars in the field receiving direction and support from Yelp Headquarters in San Francisco.
About you: Lives to write; writes to live. You know who you are. Pencils down. Has a fire in the belly. Walks through walls. Takes no prisoners. In a word: driven. Even when no one is watching. Especially then.
Social connector. You are the hub of your social world. You know everyone. Everyone knows you. You are the Mayor. The fun one. Diplomatic, too. Have more than a few years of post-graduate professional experience (existing Yelp community managers have 5 to 15 years).
About the job: Writing. Write locally compelling newsletters weekly and inspiring reviews daily. Persuasive pitches to venue owners and marketing partners. Event planning. Conceptualize, negotiate, wrangle, plan and execute cool, fun and buzz-worthy (big wow factor!) events/parties. Marketing outreach. Connect with the right local organizations, barter weekly newsletter sponsorships for promotion of Yelp. Socializing and adventuring. Meet up with yelpers. Attend civic events. See and be seen. In the scene. Be the Mayor. Always on.
WOW! A job posting written almost entirely in cliches. And freestyle rap form. The author responsible for this is most definitely the midlife crisis corporate white guy who insists on wearing graphic tees and blazers to work or that drunk white kid intern who fronts in the cipher like an arrogant motherfucker but all he wants is the affirmation/adoration of any down ass group of men of color. Mixed people included. Encouraged even. Or maybe it was written by McCain’s speech writer. Whoever wrote it is KILLING ME! Are you serious? If you are reading this, I command you to comment on the absurdity of what I’m working with out here in the so-called Real World. I need a job but these are my options! I apologize for the melodrama but I blame the Sake. I estimate that I will be blacklisted from Yelp in under 30 seconds once this entry is published. Information flows too freely these days (totally kidding)! No thank you Google.com. I’m going to sign off now and drink my body weight in water…that might stop the room from spinning. Maybe afterwards I’ll walk through walls. Enjoy the Katt Williams.
WHAT’S REALLY HOOD, BOY CRISIS?
Hello Future Famous Friends (FFF). I think we can all agree this is as perfect as a band photo gets. Shout out to Victor and Tal for the choreographed hand gesturing and Owen for the obscure prop useage. If you’re not familiar with these certified lady killers, they go by the (brilliant) name Boy Crisis and they just landed the coveted “Band of the Day” spot online @ Guardian UK. I am truly buggin’ out over how many folks make major moves when they graduate from Wesleyan. I used to think we were all fated to go on vision quests and become Buddhist monks or hardcore Neo-Conservatives. I realize now that we were meant for bigger things like Williamsburg, guiltless gentrification, the Blogosphere (ooooh shit) and TRL. Just kidding. Kind of. Real talk: I have mad love for these dudes and I need them to come play a show in San Francisco pronto (Hint, hint). Be on the look out for Boy Crisis, they are undoubtedly doing the damn thing. Woop, woop.
Filed under: New Shit | Tags: childhood dreams, parentheticals, shameless plug
Good morning, World!
…AKA my narrow readership. In any case, I am thoroughly enjoying another beautiful bay area morning snuggled up by with a bowl of Puffins “Honey Rice” and hot tea by the bay window in my sister’s future room. Bitting her style, just a little bit. Before I hop in the shower and find one of the many parks in the city to leisurely sunbathe in (oh the subtle perks of unemployment) and bugg out over the novel The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao (shout out to Junot Diaz) Ana gave me to replace my dense theory books and articles, I want to expose y’all to the one and only: Jazmine Sullivan.
Jazmine, age 11 @ The Apollo
Jazmine feat Missy “Need U Bad”
I realize now I could never blow up and become a famous r&b singer (my childhood dream) because I never made an appearance on Star Search or The Apollo when I was an awkward poorly-dressed peer-pressured little squirt. I never had power hungry industry/wannabe-industry parents. My parents barely know who Little Richard is…and he’s of their generation. Although, my dad bumps Dead Prez hardbody. I also don’t have any home videos of me obnoxiously singing to the camera and using carrots or crayons as microphones when I was five. (At that age, I wanted desperately to save whales and become a marine biologist, not that I had any vague or specific idea of what that meant…shout out to Jillian who adored the marine life as much I did. I also loved unicorns, specifically of the cartoon variety). Lastly, I’m 21. Is it just me or does anyone else feel like 21 is WAY TOO OLD to make it? I mean, Soulja Boy and JoJo were signed as fetuses. I guess we’re all over the hill. Sigh. By the by, get used to an excessive/seriously unnecessary use of (parentheticals) throughout this blog…and to think I was ever getting paid as a writing tutor at Wesleyan University. That shit was the definition of buggin’ out…I digress. Peep the Jazmine videos, I’ll come back and tell you more about who she is/why I love her. I’m off to Duboce Park to witness the on-going war between the “dog people” and the “parent people” as I daydream of one day becoming a one hit wonder like Cassie…minus Diddy and the whole talentless thing…yeah I said it.
